Let’s preface this by saying everyone is in a different season of life and that’s OK. Resolutions are important, focusing your energy is important, and being held accountable is important – but sometimes these things just may not be in your set of cards. I’ve been there. I get that. I’m living it as we speak. I’ve decided that this year I’m not focusing on a new resolution to transform my life. Between the toddler and newborn baby chaos that is in my home this year, I’m lucky to have my head on straight by the time my husband walks in the door each evening. My hope for this year is that I put my effort into things that I already do, or have done in the past, but I just haven’t done them well enough. I don’t want to tackle a drastic lifestyle change, a wellness plan, or a life focus – I simply want to keep my head above water and survive 2020. This year, I’m going to reclaim what is already mine, instead of trying to create something completely new.
A dreaded word for my toddler, who usually doesn’t want to slow down long enough to actually sit down at the table and eat. Honestly, a dreaded word for me as well because nothing is more frustrating than trying to cook something that appeases everyone in the house while dodging allergies and not losing my mind in the process. I’m guilty of tossing a peanut butter sandwich to the toddler and telling my husband he’s on his own for dinner more often than I care to admit. Don’t get me wrong, some days that is valid and totally acceptable, but I want to be better this year. I want to reclaim dinner time and sit at the table as a family. The toddler may still eat crackers and cheese, and my husband may make his own ramen, and I may not get to eat at all (because #momlife), but the goal is to sit and do it as a family. Gathering at the table all together, pretty meal placed on top or not, is something that I want to make a priority this year. It allows for conversations to occur and the TV to be turned off, and family time to be made a priority.
2020 will be the year I focus on myself for more than one second a day. If I don’t allow some time for myself into my schedule, I’m a worse mom and wife because of it. Now, by “me time” I’m not talking about a spa day, a girl’s trip, or anything expensive and extravagant (although these are all great ideas, they just aren’t always attainable). Me time will look different for everyone, but it can be so simple. Maybe I’ll take a nap when the kids do, so I can face the rest of the day with a better attitude. Maybe I’ll read a book, organize my thoughts on paper, spend time outside, take a walk or rock on the front porch. The options are endless and what works one day may not work the next, but I want to make space in my day for myself to recharge. I know my kids and husband will be grateful for the changed attitude it will bring, and I know I will be happier because of it.
Before kids, my husband and I made sure to go out on one date a week, sometimes more. Obviously that isn’t possible any more simply due to life with work, kids, school, exhaustion and all the other things. Even though we are the busiest we have ever been, I want to reclaim some of the time I used to focus into my marriage. It probably won’t be a fancy date night or even leaving the house. It may be a movie once the kids are asleep, folding and putting away the heaps of laundry we have, or doing scripture study together instead of alone. But I plan to intentionally spend time with my husband instead of absentmindedly sitting next to each other on our phones watching TV after the day is over. Anything can be a date if I make the time for it.
A new year doesn’t have to bring about a completely new you. Reclaim what is already yours and keep doing what you’re doing.
Jordan Morgan is a wife and mama living in East Tennessee and surviving on caffeine with a love for family, words, Jesus and a good swing on the front porch.