Where Our Identity Lies

Kelsey Lasher

After my oldest son was born, I felt like I didn’t know who I was anymore. I had always been a high achiever, goal-oriented, go-getter. I thrived on appreciation, attention and achievement. So when I felt the tug deep in my heart to step into a season of stay-at-home mothering, of performing for the very small audience of my newborn, it was a shock to my system.

I floundered for a while, felt like I was withering on the vine. Who was I if no one saw what I did? If I didn’t get a performance review? If I didn’t earn any money or praise?

That season revealed a dark truth within my own heart. I had a deeply misguided sense of identity. I had defined myself by what I did, what I produced, for years. I had attributed my worth to my paycheck and my value to what other people said about me. But slowly, God began to break down the false sense of self I had constructed.

I realized that whatever I did, whether flashy or mundane, something to celebrate or something to hide, God treasured me all the same.

He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs (Zephaniah 3:17, NLT).

Slowly, I began to realize that my identity is not rooted in what I do, but in what has been done for me.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9, NIV).

No matter what we do, no matter what season of life we’re in, our identity is rooted in this: we are loved, treasured and redeemed by God. May we rest in that.

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light (1 Peter 2:9, NIV).


  • Where does your identity lie? Is it in something you’ve done (good or bad)? Is it in a title you’ve received? A name someone calls you? Perhaps it’s in a choice you made or a goal you’re working toward?
  • How can you root yourself in this biblical identity?

Kelsey Lasher (kelseylasherauthor.com)